My life, my responsibility

Hear me out. If you really think about it, this is a statement of freedom and hope for your future.

Because the opposite of the above sentiment might sound like:

• "It's okay, you've been through really tough times, so I don’t expect anything more from you."

• "Yes you're a victim of your circumstances. Your life is not your own”

• "Those people hurt you and broke you, so now you're broken for life."

Life is not fair. Many of us (or more accurately, most of us) have faced hardships, pain, or trauma that were not our fault and that we did not deserve. These experiences left us hurt, broken, or damaged, not just in the moment, but with lasting scars and injuries.

You have every right to feel whatever you want in response to these events. You also have the right to sit in that space and stay there for as long as you want... or you also have the right to get up and walk.

I know it sounds impossible. But I also know that staying in that space of pain, brokenness, and 'victimhood' is tiresome and draining. As some clients put it, it can feel like “Groundhog Day” “a pit of hopelessness” or “going around in circles not knowing where I am heading”. This space does not bring you joy or hope for your future. So, you have a choice. You may not have created the problem, but you can decide to do something about it. You can take back authorship over your own life.

It is your choice and responsibility. You can remain in the narrative that your circumstances, abuser or trauma created for you, or you can decide to take responsibility for your life and your future.

Remember, you don't have to do this alone. If and when you decide to take responsibility over your problems, your life and your future, there is always help available.