Schema Spotlight #3

Schemas, formed through life experiences, encompass a range of mental elements including feelings, sensations, memories, thoughts, and beliefs. These structures profoundly influence our perception of ourselves and others, guiding our decisions and actions in navigating the world.

 Unrelenting Standards [US]: This schema reflects a fundamental belief that one must consistently meet exceedingly high internalised expectations of behaviour and performance, typically motivated by a fear of criticism. These standards often originate from external sources such as parents, teachers, or siblings, eventually internalised to form what we commonly refer to as an "inner critic" or "inner task-master."

 This schema is one of the most common schemas I come across as a therapist. It is also one of the most difficult to treat as to some extent, it can be adaptive and results in ‘positive’ outcomes. Despite its potential for driving achievement and fostering a sense of accomplishment, it can also lead to self-criticism, unhealthy comparisons, inability to relax or be compassionate toward self when things are not going well.

 While striving for excellence can be beneficial, it becomes problematic when it leads to an inability to relax, self-criticism, or a lack of self-compassion. Recognising and addressing the impact of unrelenting standards is crucial for achieving a healthier, more balanced approach to life.