Traumatic Experiences and Emotional Processing

There is a stereotype that exists in media portrayals of psychologists and counsellors being infatuated with feelings. We’ve all heard the cliché, “so how does that makes you feel?” and have rolled our eyes.

However, therapists often hear the following from their clients:

• "I know in my head that it’s not true, but I can’t help but feel that it is"

• "I know what I need to do and what’s good for me, but I can’t seem to do it"

• "Intellectually, I understand this, but it just doesn’t feel true"

• "I know I’m a capable person and not broken, but I still feel wrong or not okay"

These statements highlight that understanding something intellectually isn’t always enough to change how we feel, which in turn affects our reactions, behavioural patterns, and coping mechanisms.

 This is especially true for traumatic experiences. During a traumatic or painful event, our brain often operates outside our "window of tolerance," disrupting our usual ways of processing thoughts, emotions, and sensory information. Additionally, cognitive and emotional information are processed and stored differently in the brain. Therefore, unless we address both—through talking and emotional experiencing—parts of the trauma may remain unresolved.

 This is why many people can describe a traumatic event and intellectually understand its impact, but true healing and a sense of safety come from processing the emotional injuries of the trauma. Emotional processing in therapy can:

• Help us explore past pain from a place of safety and regulation.

• Release blocked emotions, also known as "strangulated grief."

• Connect past trauma and emotional injuries to current problems.

So, the next time your therapist asks about your feelings, remember that “thinking about and talking about” isn’t always enough. Exploring unresolved emotions in a safe way may be essential for true healing and freedom from past experiences.